In my household, both my husband and I have certain chores that we have divided between the two of us. He hates cleaning toilets so that’s always my job. I hate scrubbing showers and tubs, so that’s always his job. I should learn to keep my nose out of his jobs because somehow this one went off course…
I decided to clean the shower one ambitious Saturday and got suddenly annoyed that there were so many wash cloths hanging in our shower. Only my husband and I use that shower. There shouldn’t be 3 wash cloths and 2 body poufs for only 2 people so of course, I got rid of the excess wash cloths. I moved on to the kids bathroom and within minutes, my husband came to find me, asking why I removed his extra cloths.
“Why do you need so many? AND with a body pouf?!”
“Of course I need a washcloth for my face. I can’t wash my face with the same thing I use on my butt!”
“Agreed… but there was yet another one in there in addition to that.”
“I need that one too.”
“Why?”
“Because it gets places.”
“Where could it get that your body pouf doesn’t? The pouf should get everything and you’re creating too many dirty wash cloths.”
“I need it!”
“WHY?!”
“FOR MY TAINT, OK?! I need it for my taint! Its gets up there where the pouf doesn’t fit!”
Of course at this exact moment, Sydney, my 7 year-old daughter pops her head in the bathroom from around the corner asking, “What’s a taint?”
We just look at each other, paused like deer in headlights. Why is it that a child has the distinct gift of showing up right when you say something they shouldn’t hear?
“None of your business,” I answer.
“Well I need to know what it is if I have one. Do I have one???”
“No…. Yes…. I don’t know! Just get out!!”
The Well-Adjusted Adult 